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The Wettening


A daily calendar in Ms. Bitters' class reads Wed 7. The classroom is covered in globs of paste. Paste is on the students' desks, on the ceiling, on some of the students, and on the walls. Keef is pasted to the ceiling. Lizard boy is glued to Brain's desk. Aki's head is stuck to her desk. Spoo drips down from the ceiling.


Ms. Bitters: So, young man, now you see that there's a price to pay for eating paste.


Melvin stands at the front of the class next to Ms. Bitters, paste on his lips.


Ms. Bitters: Would you say that loosing the use of your mouth was worth it?


Melvin: Mmm hmmm.


Zim laughs.


Zim: Stupid silent glue boy!


Zim grows worried as he hears the sound of thunder. He glances to the window. Drops of rain hit the glass. Dib pops up from behind Zim's desk.


Dib: What's wrong, Zim? Don't they have rain on your planet?


Zim: Of course! We, oh, such rain we had! Eh, it was delicious!

Lightening strikes the skool. It rains harder. Zim glances around nervously. Dib frowns. The doors to the front of the skool open as skool lets out and kids run out into the rain. Zim steps out of the skool but stops under a covered area so he doesn't get wet. More and more kids run out, making sheep noises as they run into the rain. Zim sticks a finger out from under his shelter and a drop of rain hits it. Zim screams as his finger starts to smoke. He quickly pulls it back in. Zim puts a hand on Billy Slunchy's shoulder as he walks by. Zim: So, this rain... is it poisonous?


Billy Slunchy: You're kidding, right?

Billy hollers as he runs out into the rain. Dib stands behind Zim. The children start playing in the rain. They form a circle and start singing a song.


Children (singing): We love rain! We love rain!


Some children, including Torque Smacky and Mary, jump in puddles.


Children (singing): Splash, splash, splash!


Margie and Tae pop out from behind Letty's back.


Children (singing): Fun, fun, fun!


Children hop along, including Zootch and Keef.


Children (singing): Rain, rain, rain!


Children hover in the air, spinning around.


Children (singing): We love rain! We love rain! Splash, splash, splash! Fun, fun, fun!


Students fly through the air making airplane noises including The Letter M and Rob. Gretchen, Penny, and Zita hop into the air.


Children (singing): Rain, rain, rain!


Zootch pops up and makes a DJ scratchy sound. Dib looks angrily at Zim. Zim frowns. He steps down a step on the skool stair way, exposing himself to the rain. Matthew P. Mathers III runs by, chasing Smeedge. Zim turns around looking triumphant at Dib, but then he starts to smoke. Zim screams Zim runs down the stairway out into the open. Dib writes notes down on a piece of paper. Gaz appears behind him, holding an umbrella.


Gaz: I'm leaving with or without you, Dib. Preferably without you.


Dib: Go on, Gaz. I've got work to do. Fate of the world kind of work!


Zim runs by several times, still screaming.


Gaz: Ooh! Can I watch! Wait, no, forget it.


Gaz opens her umbrella. Zim finds shelter from the rain under a tree. He groans. He looks out and sees Gaz walking by, sheltered from the rain by her umbrella. Zim yells a battle cry and runs in front of Gaz. He knocks the umbrella out of her hands and grabs her. Zim lifts Gaz above his head to shelter him from the rain.


Gaz: If you wanna keep all your limbs, Zim, you will put me down, you will put me down now!


It stops raining suddenly. Light peeks through the clouds. Zim puts Gaz down. She is soaking wet. She walks over to where Zim knocked the umbrella out of her hands. She grabs the umbrella with a crazed look. She drags it over to where Zim is and is about to hit him with it when Dib jumps into a puddle in front of Zim and splashes them both. Dib grins. Gaz is even wetter. Zim shrieks as he starts to smoke again. He falls down, into a puddle and squirms around, screaming. Gaz gives Dib an angry look.


Dib: Oh, I'm sorry Zim. I meant for that to be a bigger splash!


Dib and Gaz walk home.


Gaz: That was your fate of the world work!?! Jumping in a puddle!?! You do realize I'm gonna have to destroy you now.


Dib: It was worth it. Score one for the human race! Score nothing for the Zim... thingy race.


Gaz: I will destroy you.


Dib: You just can't appreciate my strategic masterminding. Now I know that water causes him extreme discomfort and can use this to my advantage.

Zim hides behind a corner up ahead in front of Dib.


Dib: I swear, sometimes even I scare myself with how amazingly I...

Zim jumps out and screams in Dib's face. Dib falls over into a puddle, splashing Gaz.


Zim: How amazingly you can fall into a puddle? I agree.


Dib: Alright, Zim. You wanna play this way, I'll get you back! Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon! Soon, watery vengeance will be mine!


A daily calendar in Ms. Bitters' classroom reads Fri 9.


Ms. Bitters: As punishment for yesterdays paste incident, today will be devoted to having your minds erased!


Ms. Bitters sits in her desk, peeling an onion with a large knife. The words 'Paste: your chance for redemption' are written on the chalk board. Zim, Rob, Matthew P. Mathers III, and Dib sit at an art table at the back of the room. Sara and Spoo sit at another art table next to theirs along with some other students. Zim puts some paste on a piece of paper, but when he puts the paste spreader back into the paste container, some paste splatters on his glove. He feels a little bit of it with his other hand and then pulls out a scanning tool. He scans the paste on his glove, and then he picks up the container of paste and scans that. Zim looks at Dib, who is sitting across from him. The both eye each other in wide screen vision. Dib gets up and scampers to a sink. He sets the handle so just one drop drips out at a time. Zim groans and his eyes shake as the droplets hit the sink. The bell rings. Students walk out of the skool. Zim watches from behind a mailbox with a large mechanical eye attached to a mechanical arm attached to binoculars that Zim looks into. Zim watches as the students walk home when suddenly Dib pops up. Zim drops the binoculars and runs. He stops for breath behind a lamp post. He screams as he almost runs into a puddle. He pushes up against a wall and slowly walks around the puddle, then continues on his way. He hides behind a fire hydrant, but then notices a drop of water coming from the hydrant. Zim backs up into the street.


Dib: Hey, Zim!


Dib tosses a water balloon into the air and catches it. He hurls the balloon at Zim. It hits Zim and knocks him down, but it doesn't pop. It flies into the air and falls to the ground but still does not pop. It bounces around Zim and finally pops right next to his head. Zim screams. Zim wriggles around in the newly created puddle of water, smoking and screaming. Dib approaches him.


Zim: Why must this be!?!


Dib: How advanced is an alien race that can't handle a little water balloon? I don't even feel good about winning this one.


Zim stands up.


Zim: You win this round, perhaps, but watch your back, Dib.

Dib glances behind him nervously. Zim holds part of the water balloon in his hand.


Zim: Now that I have access to your water balloon technology, I will annihilate you down to your every last cell! On Monday we settle this like children.


Zim looks at his hand and sees the water balloon piece is stuck there. He shakes his hand around but it stay. Zim yanks it off and then sees that it was stuck on the paste that got on his glove earlier. Zim: Hey!


Later, in Zim's lab, Zim places the hand with the paste on it into a scanning system while wearing goggles. The computer lists the ingredients on separate monitors. They include asteroid, rat hair, cup cake, ear wax, big book, H2O, dirty dirt, past, and whale yellow. A computer screen has the words 'count down to Monday.' Zim presses a button and those words are replaced with '48:00.' Meanwhile, Dib sketches a diagram while sitting on his couch. He turns to show it to Gaz. The blue prints are to a device that attaches to Dib's back. Gaz gets off the couch holding a picture of her own and walks over in front of Dib. It shows Dib being eaten by a green monster. Meanwhile, Zim looks at paste at a cellular level through a computer screen. He separates one molecule of paste from the rest by hitting some buttons. Then he hits more buttons and makes the paste cell go over a small box. Then he presses a key that shows what would happen if rain were to fall. It doesn't effect the box inside due to the paste. Dib works on his blue prints some more. Back at Zim's lab, Zim wears goggles and brushes paste all over him. Zim presses a button on a remote attached to a wire hanging from the ceiling. Water pours out of a spout above Zim, but he is unaffected due to the paste. Zim presses another button and a machine across from Zim launches three water balloons at him. They smash on him, but Zim's paste armor protects him. Meanwhile, Dib pulls a welding mask over his face and begins welding something. Zim studies a water balloon with the Irken symbol on it that is rotating in a tube that appears to be anti-gravity. Zim walks over to his computer and slides a disk into a slot. Dib continues welding. The sun rises outside and a paperboy drops off a newspaper that says 'Sunday Edition' on it. Gaz watches as Dib pulls on a robe that lifts a hook up. The hook yanks on a flab of rubber. Zim sits at a control panel and presses a button. Dib saws on a metal pole. Dib pounds on another pole with a small mallet. Dib measures the scale of his head on the blue prints. Dib wears safety goggles as he holds a piece of metal up to a grinder with a pair of clamps. The moon looms over Dib's house. Gaz walks up to Dib, who is asleep in the garage with a water balloon.


Gaz: Hey, genius, it's Monday!


Dib gasps as he lifts his head up.


Gaz: And tape your hair down.


Outside of the skool, Flan passes a skool book to Lizard Boy by floating it to him through the skool fountain. Kids gather around as Dib walks up with a large tank of water on his back. The kids mutter things like 'what's going on' and 'what's happening.' A circle of students forms around Dib, including Gaz.


Dib: Zim!


Gaz smacks herself in the head.


Dib: Zim, you coward! Come out here and face me!

Some kids clear out of the way so Dib can see that Zim is behind them, standing perfectly still but in a cowarding position.


Dib: Poor little Zim, all that alien power and brought down by a little Earthly water! Pretty obvious who the superior being is here!


Zim still hasn't moved a muscle. The sound of a bird soaring by is heard twice.


Dib: Zim, get up already! Seriously, Zim! Get up! You think this is funny!?! Are you making fun of me!?! You know what? You're just asking for it now!

A swirl of leafs being blown by the wind flies by Zim's head.


Dib: Okay!

Dib presses a button on a handle. Some water goes into a tube which ends in a water balloon. Once the water balloon is full enough, a mechanical arm move is behind Dib. The mechanical arm hits a kid in the face. Two more arms extend attached to that one by strings of rubber, creating a large sling shot. Dib pulls a lever and the water balloon is let go, launching it at Zim. Dib laughs as the balloon hurtles towards Zim. The balloon passes through Zim and Dib stops laughing. The balloon splatters on the ground behind Zim. Zim goes into static and disappears, revealing that he was a holograph produced by a small device on the ground. Electric volts shoot from the device. The ground rumbles. The device explodes. Meanwhile, a lady who is in the shower frowns as her water suddenly stops. Cut to an old woman in an inflatable tube creature floating in a pool. The pool starts to loose water. Cut to some girls watching as a man jet skis in a dam. The dam water level starts to lower and in no time it is gone. The jet skier holds onto a ladder on the dam wall. Jhonen sits in a room reading a comic while sitting on the couch. The water in an aquarium behind him disappears and a fish flips around. The fish flips so violently in flies into the air into a glass of water. Jhonen drinks the glass along with the fish. Jhonen breaks the glass with his hand and clutches his chest. The skool fountain drains of water, showing a book at the empty bottom. Two buildings collapse and a tornado of water shoots into the sky. It goes into outer space where it reaches a space station. The space station is a ring with rubber stretched along the inside of the ring. The water is forced into the rubber making a giant water balloon with a smiley face on it. Inside a small control center on the ring, Zim turns around in a chair. He pulls some levers and closes off the end of the balloon so no water escapes it. Two tube things emerge from the ceiling and cover Zim's hands. They lift off and now Zim has large gloves on. Outside, two large mechanical arms unfold. Zim controls their movement by moving his gloves. He pretends to tie a knot and the mechanical hands tie a knot on the water balloon. The hands fold back up and the tubes reemerge from the ceiling and remove the gloves from Zim's hands. Zim presses a button on the computer screen. The monitor screen shows Earth with the word 'target' in the corner. The monitor screen zooms in on North America, then zooms in on the city where Dib lives, then zooms in on the skool yard, then zooms in on Dib. The words 'target locked' appear. Jets on the space station make the station flip completely around so the water balloon is facing towards the Earth. The station lets go of the massive balloon. The balloon hits a satellite and speaks of water as it flies towards Earth. The students run away screaming as the balloon casts a shadow over the whole town. Dib just stares, entranced. As the balloon is about to hit Dib, Dib's mouth goes agape. The balloon suddenly stops as it hits a pole. It sits there for a second, but then it pops. Dib is pushed back by the force of all the water. A window washer in the city sees the reflection of a giant wave created by the balloon in the glass he is cleaning. He turns around and stares in fear. The water breaks through the window and floods the building. Dib holds his breath as he floats towards the surface. Steve Ressel gets a hot dog at a vendor's cart when the tidal wave sweeps him from behind. Dib's device detaches from his back. The balloon creates a gigantic tidal wave. The skool is wrecked, the sign that says 'skool' is bent up and separated from the rest of the skool. A van is over turned and Chunk pops onto it. The Slunchy brothers rest on the bent up pole that popped the balloon. Some kids sit where the skool wreckage is. Lizard Boy and Flan rest on a floating piece of wood. Dib surfaces, floating on his back in the water.


Dib: The wettening... The wettening...


Gaz walks up, showing us that the water must be shallow now, and drops a water balloon on Dib's head. Dib snaps out of his trance. Zim whistles as he walks over the watery land. A duck floats in the water. Zim goes to his front door, which is all that is left of his house. He opens the door and walks in. GIR, in disguise, is playing in the water with a rubber piggy. The toilet that leads to Zim's lab is still there, and a whale lays behind it. Zim walks towards the toilet.


GIR: Hello!

GIR spits some water out of his mouth like a fountain.


Zim: GIR, I'll be in my lab bathing in paste. Don't disturb me!


Zim stand on the toilet. He starts to get pulled down but it actually starts flushing him instead of taking him to the lab. Zim claws at the toilet bowl but it drags him down. Zim screams. GIR just plays in the water, skipping on the surface and diving in while squealing.


Zim: Help! My head is stuck! GIR! Help! I can't breathe, I...

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