Granny Jojo's Birthday SurpriseEdit

Richard, Anais, Gumball, Darwin and Nicole: Happy birthday!
[Granny Jojo with her son, and the rest of the Wattersons is shown sitting at the table with a cake]
Anais: Come on, Granny Jojo. Blow out your candles!
Gumball: Yeah. I prefer my face medium-rare, not charr-grilled.
Granny Jojo: Why are there so many candles? I'm only 63.
Anais: Sorry. We didn't know exactly how old you were, so we based it on looks. Do you need some help blowing them out?
Granny Jojo: Kid, I raised your dad by myself. It's not the first time I've had to put out a fire.
[Granny Jojo blows out all her candles with a powerful gust of her breath. Richard clears his throat and taps his glass]
Richard: I think it's time for a toast. [Eats literal toast] Thank you.
[Gumball, Darwin, Nicole and Anais clap]
Richard: And now for your birthday surprise.
[He grabs some papers]
Richard: The alphabet of my mom. "A" is for "Amazing" 'cause that's what you are. "B" is for "Breakfast", one of my twelve favorite mealtimes and because you're amazing, mom. "C" is for…
[He continues talking]
Granny Jojo: Nicole, I just wanted to say that you look really average today.
Nicole: Oh Yeah!? Well you look like someone drew an ugly face on a butt with a-wait, what? Did you jet say "Average"? That's gotta be the least offensive thing you've ever said to me. You need to lie down…
Gumball: Yeah, and you gave us real candy instead of your expired fungus medication-
Darwin: And your face looks wrong. It's like your mouth is upside down-
Anais: It's almost as if you're…smiling.
Richard: …why? Because I like them. And "Z" is for "Zebra", an amazing mythical creature. But not as amazing as you, mom.
Granny Jojo: Thank you, Richard. Like every year, that was a nice surprise. And while we're on the topic, I also have a surprise for all of you.
[The doorbell rings. Richard answers the door]
Louie: Surprise!
Richard: Sorry sir, we already got a surprise here. We don't need anymore.
Louie: Nice to meet you-
[Richard slams the door, unintentionally in Louie's face. His outstretched arm sticks out through the door. Granny Jojo opens the door this time]
Granny Jojo: This is Louie, he's my boyfriend.
[She and Louie kiss for a long time, grossing Richard out. After they finish, they kiss again. This time, Richard faints]

Reviving RichardEdit

[Richard finally recovers. He sees Gumball, wobbling in his vision. His voice sounds different]
Gumball: Dad, are you alright?
Darwin: What's with the voice?
Gumball: I don't know. It just felt appropriate.
Anais: Dad, wake up!
Nicole: Get the first-aid kit!
[Gumball takes a pack of nachos and hands it to Nicole]
Nicole: Clear!
[She opens it. Immediately, Richard springs up, and takes the nachos with his mouth and chews on it wildly]

Some IssuesEdit

[They are all back at the table. Louie whispers something to Granny Jojo and she laughs. Her son watches angrily]
Granny Jojo: To be honest with you, I have no idea what he said. My hearing isn't what it used to be.
Louie: Me neither! I was just laughing, and hoping it wasn't a question.
[They laugh]
Louie: We got so much in common.
Granny Jojo: Yeah, we're both falling apart.
[They laugh again. Louie kisses Granny Jojo, and grosses Richard out once more]
Richard: So, Louie. What career plans do you have?
Louie: Um, none.
Richard: HA HA! This guy has no prospects!
Louie: Actually, I'm retired.
Richard: Come on Nicole! Laugh at him with me.
[While he laughs, she face palms]
Richard: Come on kids! Say something mean and ironic about him.
[They shake their heads]
Richard: No? Fine, I'll do it myself. Where did you retire from? Santa's factory? Because you're small! [Laughs] Burn! [Laughs, then covers face] Why did you steal my mom!?
Darwin: Uh…is it me, or is the atmosphere a little-
[The atmospheric pressure literally becomes heavy, and they (Nicole, Darwin, Gumball and Anais) sag to the floor. Darwin falls into the floor]
Darwin: Heavy!
Louie: Well, that was very nice. Catch you later, cotton tail.
[He kisses her goodbye, and heads out. As he gets out of the house, Richard points at him through the close door]
Richard: Get out of my house!
Gumball: Uh…he just did.
[He brings back Louie inside the house]
Richard: Now get out of my house!
Louie: You're the one who dragged me back here, son.
Richard: Call me son one more time! I dare you! I DOUBLE-DARE YOU! You MOTHER ROBBER! Kids, come over here.
[Gumball and Darwin come to him]
Richard: Okay, you grab this arm [Gumball takes his arm]. Now you take my leg. [Darwin takes it] LET ME AT HIM! LET ME AT HIM! You're walking in here, or you'll end up on a mobility scooter for the rest of your life! LET ME AT HIM!
[He breaks free from Gumball and Darwin's grip and smashes through the door. He sees Louie taking off in his mobility scooter]
Richard: That's right, faster! Faster, old man!
Louie: I'm trying! But this thing takes 20 minutes to go from 0 to 8 miles an hour.
[Richard grunts, and pushes Louie on his scooter away. Afterwards, he storms to Granny Jojo]
Richard: What is father gonna show when he comes back?
Granny Jojo, Anais, Gumball, Darwin and Nicole: Father?
Richard: Yeah. You said he left to buy some milk 42 years ago. He could be back in any minute!
Granny Jojo, Anais, Gumball, Darwin and Nicole: Uh-
Richard: What?
Granny Jojo: Let me explain something-
Richard: No, let ME explain something. I don't want you to see that guy anymore!
Granny Jojo: Well, I don't think it's for you to decide, young man!
Richard: When you're under my roof, you follow my rules old lady!
Gumball: I don't think anyone should follow your twelve-times-a-day rule.
Granny Jojo: Richard, I'm old enough to make my own rules, and I'm seeing Louie TONIGHT!
Richard: Go to your room! YOU'RE Grounded!
Granny Jojo: You go to your room! YOU'RE Grounded!
Richard and Granny Jojo: FINE!
[They storm off from each other. The rest of the Wattersons watch awkwardly]
Gumball: How long before they realize neither of them went in the direction of a bedroom?

Granny Jojo's "Hot" DateEdit

[Nighttime. A light clicks open in Gumball's bedroom. Gumball, sleeps peacefully as a shadow covers him]
Granny Jojo: Gumball.
[Opening an eye, he sees his grandmother beside him, wearing fancy clothes with make-up on. The scene closes up on her face]
Gumball: [Gasps] Oh wait, this is clearly a nightmare. Nothing could be this ugly in real life.
Darwin: We helped Granny Jojo make herself pretty for Louie. What do you think?
Gumball: Huh. What do you know? [Screams hysterically]
Anais: Yeah, I agree with you. But this is the best we could do short of a face transplant.
Gumball: She looks like a haunted christmas!
Darwin: We were hoping you could help us out.
Gumball: Well how 'bout we start with a longer dress? I don't think we should see her legs, they remind me of processed ham. Actually, have you tried a bag over her head?
Darwin: Yeah, we tried that first. But she needed to breath in these holes and then you could see bits of her.
Gumball: Oh, I got an idea. [Switches off light]
Granny Jojo: Okay, that's enough! [Switches on light] Are you kids gonna help me sneak out, or what?
Gumball: U-uh I don't know, Granny Jojo. I-I really don't want to come between you and dad. It'd be like getting caught between a saggy rock, and a fat sweaty place.
Granny Jojo: Oh, Gumball. If you could only understand the meaning of true love. The yearning to be one with another soul. To hold him tightly in your arms-
Gumball: Please stop, I'm getting a mental picture. It's really high-def.
Granny Jojo: Hear him whisper in your ear: I love you, I love you-
Gumball: Fine! Fine! We'll do it! Just please stop talking.
[From the window, Louie's whistling can be heard. They see him with outside]
Louie: Is your grandma in?
Gumball: Yeah, she'll be right down.
[A rope made up of tied sheets is lowered]
Gumball: It's not long enough. What else can we use?
Granny Jojo: Kids, close your eyes.
[They do as she says. She takes something off. The rope suddenly lengthens. Granny Jojo's body is shown to be almost shapeless and saggy]
Darwin: Oh man! I can't believe how big granny's girdle is.
Gumball: I can't believe I'm touching it with my bare hands.
Anais: I can't believe I'm genetically predestined to wear one some day.
Granny Jojo: Okay, enough chit-chat. Help me up. I don't wanna break a leg before my hot date.
[They drop the rope, and try carrying her out the window]
Gumball: What the weight? How can someone so small be so heavy?
Granny Jojo: Well I have two metal hips, one orthopedic shoe, six gold teeth, a plate in my head, and an industrial-strength pacemaker. I got so much metal in me I'm legally classified as a motorized vehicle. Anyway, where's the rope?
[The rope is gone. Gumball turns to Anais]
Gumball: Didn't I tell you to tie the end to something?
Anais: Didn't I tell you to tie the end to something?
Darwin: Didn't I tell you-
Gumball: Oh, sorry. My bad. I didn't tell anyone to tie it.
Granny Jojo: We need another plan.

In Nicole and Richard's BedroomEdit

Nicole: Oh Richard, you can't stop her from seeing Louie. Remember what we were like when we fell in love...
[Flashback to when they were still teens. Richard is on a ladder, singing with a guitar to Nicole at the window of her house]
Richard: "I" is for "Incredible" 'cause that's what you are. "J" is for-
Nicole's father: Nicole, where are you?
Nicole: Quick! Dad's coming.
[Nicole closes the window. Richard loses his balance, and breaks the steps of the ladder on the way down with his face]
Richard: I'm oka-
[The guitar falls inside his mouth. The flashback ends]
Richard: Of course I remember. The doctor couldn't remove one of the strings. [Plucks a string inside himself]
Nicole: Richard, your mother's never been this happy…or nice. I don't want you to ruin that.
Richard: Alright, I'll speak with her.

Gumball's Rube Goldberg MachineEdit

[An assortment of different things is in Gumball's room, making up his Rube Golberg Machine.]
Gumball: Alright! So the plan is we knock over the DVDs, which sets off the mouse trap, which sends the golf ball up there, which sets off the dominos, which sets off the toy car, which will switch on the fan, which will send the turtle to the rope, which will bite it, dropping the desk, propelling Granny Jojo through the window and she uses her bloomers to land safely in Louie's arm. Everybody ready?
[He starts it. At first, his creation seems to works. Then in the end, it sends Granny Jojo smacking up against the ceiling instead of out the window]
Anais: Maybe we could just open the front door.

More IssuesEdit

[Gumball lets Louie in]
Louie: Ah, thanks kid. Hello, cotton tail.
Richard: No!
[As they are about to kiss, Richard comes out of his room, and blocks their mouths. He gets saliva on his hand. He wipes this off on Gumball's face]
Gumball: Well, That's that face ruined.
[He throws away his head, and grows a new one]
Richard: Get away from my mom, get out of our lives! I am the man of this house!
Louie: Well [Removes short] It seems there's only one way to settle this.
Granny Jojo: Uh. Please don't lower your standards, and demonstrate your manhoods in physical confrontation.
Gumball: You're right Granny Jojo. A man-off is a great idea!
Louie: I was gonna say we could settle this by sitting down, and having a calm, reasonable conversation.
Richard: I was gonna suggest rock, paper, scissors!
Gumball: Okay. Then man-off it is!

The Man-OffEdit

[They are in the backyard]
Gumball: A man eats meat with his fingers. A man doesn't need to wash his pants to really stand up by themselves. A man scratches whatever part of his body he likes in public, and shows no shame! A man drinks straight from the milk carton. When he spills some on the floor, he cleans it with his sock. So, it'll be hard to figure out who of you two is the best man! But, we will give it our manly best. Gentlemen! Your first trial will be…hair-growing.
Louie: Oh, well I've won.
Gumball: What-how?
[Louie is seen to be very hairy]
Louie: Kid, I'm 72 years old. I need to shave 17 times a day. Just while you were talking, my nose hair reached my bottom lip.
Darwin: And the winner is Louie!
Richard: What!? What about my sole patch?
[Richard shows them a small patch of hair on his chin]
Gumball: Psst.
[Louie's hair grows to the point of covering his whole body]
Gumball: Next round: Man washing!
[Anais evaluates them washing themselves. Richard washes himself with his clothes on, and Anais is grossed out by his smell. Louie washes himself with a toothbrush. When Anais smells his breath, her head spins around, her ears pop off, and she melts]
Gumball: [Announcing] Man sitting!
[Louie and Richard sit on the couch. They spread their legs as wide as they can. Louie practically does a split while Richard falls on the ground]
Gumball: [Announcing] Man cooking!
[Louie cooks some meat, and Gumball eats it. He spits it out]
Gumball: Ugh, it's rare!
Louie: That's how a man eats.
Richard: That's not rare, this is!
[Richard tries to eat a live cow. It kicks him away]
Gumball: [Announcing] Man whistling!
[Louie does a whistle with his hand]
Richard: Ha! I could do it better with only one finger. [Chokes on finger]
Gumball: [Announcing] Man dancing!
[Richard dances to a radio, while Louie does nothing]
Gumball: That was a trick question. A real man doesn't dance.

The Feelings, The Bad Father and The Good SonEdit

[Scene goes to the living room]
Gumball: And for the final challenge: sharing your emotions!
Louie and Richard: What???
Gumball: [Evil laugh] Yes! All of this was a trick to make you confront man's deepest, darkest fear: talking about your feelings.
Richard: [Scoffs] Well that's a waste of time, there's nothing to talk about.
Granny Jojo: Oh Richard, what about your dad? I thought you understood he didn't really go to get milk?
[Richard suppresses his emotions. He stops himself from crying]
Richard: I know…I know. It's just that I really…r-really…
Granny Jojo: I know, I know. I liked him too. It's just…he felt otherwise. Come on, just let it all out.
[Richard cries hard. Granny Jojo comforts him amidst the shower of tears and mucus]
Granny Jojo: Come on, kid. That's it.
Richard: [Stops crying] It's just, I'm worried that you'll like Louie better than me- [Sniffs] And then-and then I'll lose you too. [Sniffs]
Granny Jojo: [Kisses him on cheek] Don't be sillier than you already are. Your brain might stall once, and for all.
Richard: You know, I want you to be happy too. LOUIE! [Hugs] From now on, I'll call you daddy!
Louie: Um [Clears throat] A lot of weather we've been having lately.
[Richard puts him down, and Louis pats him]
Anais: Are you gonna be okay, dad?
Richard: Yes, sweetie. There comes a time when in your life, you have to grow up, and become a man.
[Richard hugs his family. Louie and Granny Jojo kiss happily (disgusting him again, and making him gag)]
[Episode ends]

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