[The episode begins at the Krusty Krab. A scream is heard and an angry customer walks up to the register.]
Shubie: I wish to register a complaint!
[She shows Squidward a sea urchin on her Krabby Patty. The urchin growls.]
Squidward:[screams] An urchin!!
[She throws her patty and the urchin in the register boat.]
Squidward: Hey, lady, take your infested-patty with you! Okay, no need to panic, Squidward. It's just a puny urchin. Everything's gonna be fine as long as you...[grabs his cash register and smashes the urchin with it] Smash it! Smash it! Smash it! [falls into the register and gets up] Whew!
[Squidward sees the urchin on his nose and freaks out. He attempts to smash the urchin with the register, but ends up getting smashed in the face. SpongeBob comes by, pushes the button, and Squidward pops his head out from the register. The urchin is heard whimpering.]
SpongeBob:[gasps] Squidward, I'm surprised at you. That little urchin wasn't hurting anyone. [removes the urchin from Squidward's nose] He's still one of Neptune's creatures. No matter how small he is. [walks into the kitchen with the urchin] This is where the magic happens, little urchin. First, we turn up the heat, but don't make it too hot. [turns on the heat on the grill] Would you like to see a menu, Monsieur? [laughs as the urchin bites SpongeBob's nose] Ow!
[The urchin falls onto the knob, turns the grill up to a high temperature, and crawls underneath.]
SpongeBob: Okay, little guy, see you later. [rubs his nose] Good thing he is a little guy. Ouch.
[As SpongeBob leaves to get more patties, the grill turns red-hot. SpongeBob comes back with the patties and flops them on the grill. The patties hop up and down in a Latin rhythm and SpongeBob dances. Outside the kitchen, Squidward is sweating from the grill's high temperature and his employee hat catches on fire. SpongeBob dances so much that his body begins to sweat. His sweat drops fall on the hot grill and gives off steam. The patties are completely burned and they shrink to a smaller size.]
SpongeBob: What the shrimp? [his body starts shrinking] Hey, what's going on here? [notices the high temperature on the grill] Whoa! That's too hot! [tries to turn the grill down, but his fingers are too sweaty] Whooaaa!!! [shrinks down to a smaller size and comes out from the sleeve of his pants] Wow. [notices he's naked] Oops. [laughs]
[SpongeBob climbs up to the condiment counter and grabs two pickles slices for clothing. He walks over to the toaster and looks at his reflection.]
SpongeBob: I steamed myself tiny. Whoo-hoo! I steamed myself tiny! Whoo! [turns and sees the entire kitchen] This place is huge! [gasps and jumps back down to the floor] My spatula's huge! And just look at the size of my grill. It's huge! [climbs up to the grill, touches the surface and burns his toe] Ow!
[SpongeBob grabs two slices of butter and plops his feet on them to make them as ice skates. He sings to himself and skates a figure eight on the grill's surface. However, because of the high temperature, the butter immediately melts and SpongeBob's feet catch on fire.]
SpongeBob: Ow! [stammers and screams]
[SpongeBob jumps into a can of ketchup. He sighs in relief. Then he attempts to flip the patty with his spatula.]
SpongeBob:[grunting] Come on, flip! Whoa! [gets flopped by the patty]
[SpongeBob drills a hole through the patty with his drill-like nose. He pulls out his drill-nose and recreates a new one. He laughs just as the grill short-circuits and blows out.]
SpongeBob: Uh-oh. The grill blew out. Well, [sniffs] it isn't gonna fix itself. [flicks his nose] That's one small step for SpongeBob, one giant leap for— [jumps down to the bottom of the grill] Whee!! [lands in a goop of grease] Whoa! [absorbs the grease, which makes him lose his pickle clothes] Bob. [sprits the grease out] Whew! [slips a little bit] Whoa!
[SpongeBob wanders around under the grill and hears a noise as if someone is crying.]
SpongeBob: What is that?
[SpongeBob climbs on a rotten Krabby Patty and sees the urchin caught in a trap.]
SpongeBob: Hey, it's my little urchin friend. Aww, hey, little guy, don't cry. Your old pal, WheeBob, will get ya outta there.
[SpongeBob tries to pull the spring-loaded bar up, but ends up pulling off his arms. SpongeBob then uses his teeth to hold the bar up, which frees the urchin. But SpongeBob ends up losing his dentures. He smiles and laughs.]
SpongeBob: Little urchin, you are free to go! You okay?
[The urchin roars and SpongeBob screams. The urchin then gives SpongeBob a chase.]
SpongeBob:[pricks SpongeBob with its prickles] Yeouch!
[The urchin chases SpongeBob up to the grill, across the fryers and up to the soda dispenser. SpongeBob clings on the lever and pours soda on the urchin.]
SpongeBob: Sorry little guy! [falls off the lever] Whoa!
[The soda sends SpongeBob and the urchin down the drain in the middle of the floor.]
SpongeBob: Whoo! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
[SpongeBob clings onto one of the holes of the drain while the urchin falls deeper into the sewer.]
SpongeBob: Follow the pipes to freedom, little guy! I'll never forget you. [pulls the prickle off his butt] Really. [climbs out of the drain and hears a loud noise] Ow! What is all that noise?
Squidward:[rings bell] One Krabby Patty!
SpongeBob: Comin' right up!
[SpongeBob carries a Krabby Patty out from the kitchen and into the dining room. Squidward takes notice of SpongeBob and thinks he's another urchin.]
Squidward: Urchin?! [grabs a ladle and pushes a customer aside] Smash it! Smash it! Smash it!
[Squidward swings his ladle around as he attempts to hit SpongeBob. In doing so, he ends up hitting the customers and knocking over several tables. During the chase, SpongeBob bumps into Mr. Krabs' foot.]
Mr. Krabs: Ah-ha! [picks up the patty with SpongeBob] You're gettin' sloppy, Plankton. Squidward almost squashed ya. [laughs and opens the door] Back to the bucket with ya!
SpongeBob: No! No, Mr. Krabs! It's meeee!!!! [gets kicked out and sent flying to the doors of the Chum Bucket] Whoa-ho! [lands safely on the floor]
[Karen scans SpongeBob.]
SpongeBob: Ooh! [giggles] That tickles.
Karen: Well, SpongeBob SquarePants, it looks like you lost a little weight.
SpongeBob: Oh, hi, Karen. Where's Plankton?
Karen: You landed on him.
[SpongeBob looks down and sees that he is sitting directly on Plankton.]
SpongeBob: Hi, Plankton! [gets off]
Plankton: SpongeBoob? Why are you so small? Is this a trick?
Karen: Calm down. He's clean. I frisked him.
SpongeBob: I didn't mean to get small like you, Plankton. It was a freak accident.
Plankton: Huh? Who are you callin' a freak?! Wait a second. [giggles and takes out a tape measure] Hold this. [measures SpongeBob while he holds the tape; gasps] You're not small like me, Shorty! I am a towering half-a-millimeter taller than you! [laughs] I win! [laughs evilly]
SpongeBob: Hooray! [lets go of the tape and Plankton gets himself tangled in it] I'll get that.
Plankton: Don't touch that! [gets sliced up by the tape]
Plankton:[falls into pieces] Get him outta here, Karen!
Karen: Way ahead of ya, Chief.
[Karen flicks SpongeBob out of the Chum Bucket and sends him flying into the windows of the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob slides down the window just as a purple kid comes by.]
Kid #1: Cool!
[The kid grabs SpongeBob and chews on him like gum. Then he runs into the restaurant and meets up with his friends.]
Kid #1:[spits SpongeBob out] Ha, ha! I've found an action figure!
Kid #2: Whoa! I saw it first!
Kid #3: No, I did!
Kid #1: Finders keepers!
[The purple kid swings SpongeBob during the fight.]
Kid #2: What's the matter with you?
SpongeBob:[gets licked by the purple kid] Bleach!
Kid #1: Got my spit on it!
SpongeBob:[slips out of the kid's hand] Whoa! You can't catch me! [laughs]
[SpongeBob runs into the Krabby Playland ball pit while the kids chase him.]
Kid #1: Stop him! Don't let him get away!
[The kids jump in the ball pit and send numerous balls flying. SpongeBob rides on a red ball and bounces on several tables. The kids continue chasing him, knocking over several tables in the process. SpongeBob jumps off the ball and laughs.]
Kid #1:[gets hit by the ball] This is the best action figure ever!
[SpongeBob jumps into the register boat and hops into Squidward's shirt pocket.]
SpongeBob: SpongeBob in the corner pocket! Doink!
[The kids jump into the register boat and pummel Squidward.]
Squidward: You brats get back in the play area or I'll eighty-six your face!
[SpongeBob, who is on Squidward's head, blows a raspberry, dances, laughs and shakes his butt.]
Kids: We want our action figure back!
[The orange kid kicks Squidward's leg.]
[Mr. Krabs grabs SpongeBob.]
Mr. Krabs: Krusty Krab action figures aren't free ya know! So, get your parents' money and you can have it.
[The kids stare menacingly at the other customers. Everyone leaves their tables and run out while the kids chase them.]
Squidward: Uh, Eugene, we don't sell action figures.
Mr. Krabs:[looks at SpongeBob] Hmm...
[Mr. Krabs gasps.]
Squidward: What the—[faints]
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, what are you doing in my hand? And why aren't you back there flippin' patties?
SpongeBob: Sorry, Mr. K. I shrunk myself by mistake. But I won't let it affect my job. I will get back to flippin' right now. [goes for the kitchen, but gets pulled back by Mr. Krabs]
Mr. Krabs: Hold on there, Tiny. I can't have you workin' the grill no more. Too dangerous for a little guy like you.
SpongeBob: Oh, please, Mr. Krabs! There must be some job I could do! I don't care what it is! Please, please, please!
Mr. Krabs: Alright, I'll think of somethin'. But since you're so small now, I can only pay ya a penny. A year.
SpongeBob: Whoa! [receives a penny] That's big money! [gets squished by the penny] Whoa!
Mr. Krabs: Hmm. Now what could I do with a little SpongeBob?
[Mr. Krabs forms a thinking cloud while he thinks. In the cloud, a sign is formed with the words, "Personal Hygiene Service" on it. He likes the idea and takes the sign from the thinking cloud. He swipes the cloud away and hammers the sign on the menu.]
Dirty Customer: Personal Hygiene Service?
[The customers line up.]
Customer: Did you see that? Personal Hygiene Service!
Mr. Krabs: Roll up your sleeves, boy-o! You're a personal hygienist now!
SpongeBob: Whoo-hoo! Yay!
[The scene changes to SpongeBob cleaning the food off of a customer's teeth. Then he rubs his body around the back of another customer.]
Tom: Oh, right there. Yeah.
[The scene changes to SpongeBob mowing the back hair of another customer's back with a mini lawnmower. Then he cleans the fungus out from under the toe of another customer.]
Mr. Krabs: Break time, SpongeBob! Take five, but hurry back! You gotta start earnin' that penny!
[SpongeBob runs into the kitchen and climbs onto the sink to wash up.]
Squidward:[walks in the kitchen, mumbling] Hmph. Work the register, clean the windows, make the patties. I have to do everything now. Thanks a lot, ShrinkBob. [flips a patty but ends up getting it in his eye, burning it] Ow! Ow! [grunts as the patty falls on the grill]
SpongeBob: It's okay, Squidward! I'll make the patties for you—oh. Yeah. I forgot. I'm too little. [sits down on a bar of soap] Boy, I'm really gonna miss my old job.
[Squidward puts eye drops in his burnt eye.]
Mr. Krabs: Lunch rush is over, Mr. Squidward! Now, wash those dishers!
Squidward:[growls and mumbles] "Lunch rush is over, Mr. Squidward. Now, wash some dishes."
[Squidward stomps over to the sink, grabs SpongeBob and rubs him against a dirty dish with soap and water. Suddenly, the soap and water makes SpongeBob grow bigger.]
SpongeBob: The bubbles are making me bigger! More bubbles!
Squidward: What the—[freaks out and throws SpongeBob in the sink]
SpongeBob: Thank you, Squidward! I'm big enough to flip patties again! [grows larger due to the soap and water] Oh-ho-ho!
[SpongeBob grows larger until his arms, while holding Mr. Krabs and Squidward, pop through the walls of the restaurant.]
Mr. Krabs: Whoa!
[SpongeBob's head pops through the ceiling. The customers are squished against the windows.]
Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward, call the fire department!
SpongeBob: No need to call 'em, Mr. Krabs. [pulls his feet through the floor] We'll be there in five minutes depending on traffic. [laughs as he walks off with Squidward and Mr. Krabs in his hands and while using the entire restaurant as new clothes]