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Scene opens up with camera zooming into the backyard.
Phineas: So Ferb, what should we do today? I mean, besides giving Perry a bath.
[Both sniff, Perry chatters, race car sound]
What is that wonderful noise? Awesome. Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!
Candace: Oh, I have got to take a new picture of myself for my blog. I didn't realize mine is already a week old.
[Snapshot] That's better.
What are you doing to Mom's car?!
Phineas: We tricked it out!
Candace: You don't even know how to drive.
Phineas: Well, duh. That's why Ferb built this remote.
Candace: Oh, you are so busted. Mom! Mom! Mom! Um, where's Mom?
Phineas: She's playing bridge at Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro's.
Ferb: [Slams hood]
Candace: They won't get away with it this time.
[Rings doorbell]
Vivian: Oh Candace, dear. Bubela, how good to see you. What a coincidence. Do you know your mom is here?
Candace: Mmm mmm. Yeah, I do, Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro. I need to talk to her if you don't mind.
Vivian: Oy Vey. Look how tall you are now. You must've grown a couple of inches since the last time I've saw you.
Candace: That was last week, Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro.
Vivian: Well your mom's inside, dear. Where are your braces? I thought you were wearing braces.
Candace: Yeah. MOM! MOM! MOM!
Linda: What is it, Candace?
Candace: You have got to see what Phineas and Ferb are doing!
[Car zooming]
Phineas: Hey, Ferb. What's the red button for?
[Car zooming, Pushes button]
Candace: MOM!
[Explosion!]
Linda: What is it? What do you want me to see?
Candace: Look!
Phineas: Hi Mom!
Linda: Hi, boys! [At Candace] Now, if that's all, I'll just be getting back to the game.
[Whistling, thud]
Phineas: Good thing we've beefed up the suspension.
[Car revving]
Woah! What else can it do?
Isabella: Hi Phineas.
Phineas: Oh, hi, Isabella.
Isabella: Whatcha doin'?
Phineas: We're entering The Swamp Oil 500 today.
Isabella: Aren't you gonna need a pit crew?
Phineas: Do you know a pit crew?
Isabella: Well, I know a few people who work well together.
Phineas: Great! Your hired! See you at the track. [At Ferb] Hey Ferb, where's Perry?


Major Monogram: Good morning, Agent P. The evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz is up to his old tricks. For reasons completely unknown, he's purchased a giant airship, or Blimp. As the kids say. Your mission is to find out why, and if necessary, put a stop to it.
Doo be doo be doo ba Doo be doo be doo ba
Perry!


Isabella: Hi Phineas. I got your pit crew.
Phineas: Cool! See ya in the pits.
Isabella: Okay, girls. We're dealing with a 426 cubic inch, fully-blown V8, with hypo lifters, radical cam and a limited slip differential.
Gretchen: Would that be electronically fuel-injected?
Candace: Phineas! Phineas! PHINEAS!
Man: Hey! I can't hear the cars!
Jeremy: Hey, Candace! I didn't know you were a racing fan!
Candace: Jeremy. [Slaps] Who, me? Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm a big fan of those, uh, uh, that red one's cute!
Jeremy: Oh, that's Billy Ray Digler's car. He's great.
Candace: Yeah. He's the best. That Billy Roy.
Jeremy: Billy Ray.
Candace: Billy Ray. I-I love it when he turns left and then... he turns... left again, and then-
Dave: And in the 3rd lane, the newcomers Team Phineas! Now is it just me, or does he look a little young to be behind the wheel of a 700 horse power racing machine?
Rick: Yes, yes he does.
Dave: And look, he's already got his own screaming fans!
Candace: [On screen] PHINEAS!
Phineas: Hey, Candace is rooting for us!
Jeremy: Candace, you're on the big screen!
Candace: [On screen, slow mo] PHINEAS!
Jeremy: And your little brother's gonna be on TV.
Candace: Phineas? On TV? TV! That's it! They are so busted. Can you wait here for a second? Thanks.

Linda: What is it, Candace? I'm right in the middle of a Three-No trump.
Candace: Turn on the TV!
Linda: All right. All right, Candace. This better be good.
[TV static]
Candace: Well? Well? Do you see it?
Linda: Just a second, honey.
Vivian: Turn on the cable box first.
Linda: Hmm. All right. [CD ejects] Wait... 'kay, that's not it. Um, is it this one? No, this is another phone.
-Summer only last-
Oh! I turned on the stereo!
Candace: Mom, hurry up!
Linda: Okay, just a second!
TV Narrator: Are you embarrassed about flaking? Itching? Peeling?
Linda: Candace, this is a dandruff commercial. Is there something you're trying to tell me?

Phineas: Okay, Ferb. Are we good to go?
Ferb: [Ding]
Rick: And with the race about to start, there's the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated blimp!


Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc.!
Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Perry the Platypus! I'm glad you're here. Actually, I was just getting ready to serve some PLATYPUS UNDER GLASS! You're just in time to witness my latest invention... My Deflate-Inator Ray! Which I will demonstrate by deflating the tires of the Jefferson Motor County Speedway! After which, I will deflate everything in the Tri-State Area! That way, if anyone want's anything flatted, they will have to talk to me.


Candace: Phineas, you are in big trouble, Mister-! [Cars zooming]
Jeremy: Candace, you got a little-
Photographer: [Snapshot] Smile! Souvenir picture, only a dollar.
Candace: AAH! Wait a second. [Grabs camera]
Photographer: HEY!
Candace: [Snapshot] Now I gotcha.
Photographer: [Snatches picture] Hey, Missy. Two pictures, two bucks.
Candace: Oh, yeah, uh, I've only got a dollar, but uh, I just want the one. You can just tear the other one up, 'kay?
Photographer: [Rips picture]
Candace: I've got 'em now! [Laughing]
Rick: And on the fast on the inside lane is Number 42, Team Phineas!
Phineas: Hey, Ferb. Do you think we can get any more power? I mean, I know it's just a battery. But I was thinking: Let's open it up and see what this puppy can- [Classic car honking] Uh, Ferb? We're actually slowing down now. Ferb? Hello? [Car speeds up] OH YEAH! NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!
[Telephone rings]
Isabella: Hey, Ferb. We should bring Phineas in for a pit stop. All right, Fireside Girls, let's move, move move!
[Equipment whirring]
That helmet looks so manly.
Phineas: Thanks.
Isabella: Hit it, Ferb. [Tires screeching]
I'm so proud of you girls. And the bow was a nice touch, Gretchen.
[Engine whirring]


Doofenshmirtz: [Laughing] Listen to those fools, as they worship their candy-colored race car man. How about a little demonstration of my deflationary prowess? [Fires laser]


Man #2: I got it! [Ball hissing, tires screeching]
Race Car Driver: AAH! [Tires screeching, rams a sign]
(Song: Go, Go, Phineas)
[Crash]
Rick: The Team Phineas car is avoiding every obstacle! It's like he can see the whole darn track at once!
[Guitar solo]
Isabella/Fireside Girls: Go Phineas, Go, go Phineas! (X2)
Phineas: OH YEAH!
Isabella/Fireside Girls: Go Phineas, Go, go Phineas! (X2)
Racers: We're okay! [Car zooms by]

Candace: Well Mom, what do you think of this?
Linda: You've looked better.
Candace: What? What do you mean-
[Horror music] AAH!


Doofenshmirtz: Already the fear me, listen to their screams, huh? Imagine the mayhem once my Deflate-Inator ray is fully charged. Run! Run like the wind, my little indentured rodent. And I will give you some cheese. Heh, I know I had some around here somewhere.
Perry: [Pulls out briefcase filled with cheeses; Grabs stinky cheese and loads it in crossbow]
Doofenshmirtz: I think there's some- There used to be some Roquefort around the back here. I don't...
Perry: [Fires crossbow]
[Mouse squeaking]
Doofenshmirtz: Hmm? AIEE! [Screaming] AIEE! [Glass breaks] Agh! Oof! [Laser fires, Blimp deflating] Hmm. I suppose I should have seen that coming.


Candace: But Mom, you've got to believe me! Wait a minute! I bet it's still on TV!
Linda: That's good, Candace. Go watch a little TV.
Dave: And look at this amazing finish!
Candace: [Stammering] Mom! Come quick! Come look-look-look-look-look!
Linda: All right, I'm coming. [Candace giggling]
Dave: Oh no! A blimp is about to hit the broadcasting tower! Oh, the hu... [TV Static]
Linda: Uh huh.
Candace: Meep.
Linda: Deal me back in, Viv.


[Tires squealing, car zooms off]
Phineas: Hmm. Looks like we're walking.
Doofenshmirtz: AAH!


Candace: [Mimicking Linda] "Why don't you go back home, Candace?" "I'm busy with my bridge game, Candace?" She has no idea!
[Crickets chirping]
[Gasps]
Gotcha.


[Perry and Doofenshmirtz fighting]
Doofenshmirtz: AHH-AHH-AHH-AHH-AHH! AAH!
[Beeping]
[EXPLOSION!]


Candace: MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM!
Vivian: Oh, Candace, Hello. I can't believe you grown so much, it's unbelievable...
Candace: MOM! Mom, you've gotta see this! It's about your car!
Linda: All right.
Candace: Come on, come on, come on!
Linda: Candace, you're wearing out the heels of my shoes.
Candace: See Mom? Look, look! I told you?
Linda: [Gasps] But... who did this?
Candace: Phineas and Ferb.
Linda: You mean... they...
Candace: Yeah, yeah, yeah! [Laughing]
Linda: They washed my car?
Candace: YES! No...what?
[Perry chatters]
Linda: It's beautiful. I gotta admit, I thought you we're exaggerating a bit, but this is really worth getting excited about.
Phineas: Hi, Mom, we're home!
Linda: Hey, Boys! I saw what you did today.
Phineas: Yeah? How'd you like it?
Linda: I love it. Now who wants some snacks?
Phineas: Thanks, Mom.
Linda: Honey, close your mouth.


Credits roll
(Song: Go, Go, Phineas)
[Guitar solo]
Isabella/Fireside Girls: Go Phineas, Go, go Phineas! (X2)
Phineas: OH YEAH!
Isabella/Fireside Girls: Go Phineas, Go, go Phineas!

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