Jake: [Sounds of concentration] [Then farts] [Seals Squeez-E-Mart bag like a balloon.]
Flame Princess: [Shoots the balloon with her fire] [Balloon explodes]
Finn: That was awesome! Alright, alright, my turn. [Lies on Jake's back] [Sounds of concentration] [Then burps] [Seals Squeez-E-Mart bag like a balloon.]
Flame Princess: [Focuses on balloon and shoots the balloon] [Balloon explodes]
Flame Princess: [Laughter] You guys are full of magic air.
Jake: [Gasps] [Farts]
Finn: [Disgusted] Gross! [Rolls with Jake] [Then slaps Jake] No! [Turns to Flame Princess] Princess? You, okay?
Flame Princess: [Looks downed] Yeah... It's just the air smells bad from your magic tricks, and now I feel sad. [Looks at Finn and Jake] I left all my scented candles at the castle. They'd really cut through the magic stink.
Jake: Just go back to the Fire Kingdom and get 'em. Problem solved.
Flame Princess: [Sighs] [Then stands up] Then I'll have to see my dad. I'm still mad at him for imprisoning me in that lantern. So UNFAIR! [Flame Princess transforms again to her enraged form.] [Screams with anger]
Finn & Jake: [Frightened]
Finn: Uh, we can go get 'em.
Flame Princess: [Returns to her normal form.] [Pleasant voice] Really? That would be really nice. [Warns] But don't let my Pops see you. I don't want "His Majesty" thinking I need anything from him.
Flambo: [Agrees to Finn] Alright! [Rubs both of his hands] [Flambo casting the Flame Shield; chants and also creates a series of runic symbols. He grows two big fists and hits Finn and Jake on the forehead.]
[Scene cuts to the Fire Kingdom]
Jake: [Stretches his left arm to hold onto something with Finn holding onto his back, sneaking pass the Flame Guards.]
[Seconds later, inside Flame Princess's room in the palace]
Finn & Jake: [Tip toe walking towards near the scented candles.]
Finn: These candles, must be "They."
Jake: [Sniffing the candles] [Whispers] They smell like an old lady's bathroom.
Finn: [Whispers with anger] Hey! Don't disrespect my lady!
Jake: [Whispers in reply] I said that as a compliment. Like, it reminds me of grandma. I love my grandma.
Finn: [Takes the candles and puts them into his backpack.]
[Seconds later, two voices are heard behind the door.]
Furnius: No one comes-sss here. Not since Flame Princess [Finn jumps and lies close to the bottom of the door.] leaved [for left] the castle. Now guesssss what we're gonna kill Flame King with?
Finn: [Gasps] [Then whispers] A conspirator with a hiss voice!
Theater troupe leader: Five minutes are closing everyone, five minutes.
Finn & Jake: [Takes two members of the theater troupe to a room.]
Finn: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Jake: [Picks up a table with food on it]
Finn & Jake: [Runs with disguises on]
Jalapeño pepper: [Panting] [Then heads to a room] Oh. Psh, actors.
[Moments later, Finn and Jake catch up with the theater troupe]
Finn: [Lays a hand on a theater troupe member] What's going with the costumes?
Theater troupe member: [High voice] This is a theater troupe. We're getting rrready to perform for the king. Everyone in the kingdom shall be in attendance. [Lowered voice] Of course, you know all this being fellow actors from the exact same troupe. [Turns around and picks clothes]
Jake: [Makes a distance with Finn] I have an idea. We'll go on stage, act like two conspirators, you will have one shoe untied, I'll talk with a hiss voice, we'll talk about how we want to kill the king, as we do these, we'll study the faces of the audience, a move of guilty reactions.
Finn: [Likes it] That's brilliant!
Jake: Thanks! It's an original idea, by me.
[Moments later, at the stage play, Flame King appears and the lights went low for the play.]
Finn: [Clears throat] Hey conspirator!
Jake: Hey co-conspirator!
Finn: Let's talk about how we're gonna kill the king.
Jake: Shhhhhh sssssomebody might here our evil plot.
Flame King: [Not liking it] Man, I am so lost.
Jake: Psst, the audience.
Suspect: [Moaning] [Then sneezes]
Jake: You think that's one of them.
Finn: Maybe, let's keep goin'. So, what are you packin'?
Jake: Water, man. Enough of it to put out the King's fire.
Suspect: [Still moaning] [Then eats a hot dog] [Looking around with suspicion]
Finn: I thinks he's starting to crack. Water? You know what is more painful, if we pour ice in his ear. That's how we'll kill the Flame King.
Flame King: [Bored] Psh, kill the Flame King? [Thinks about it] [Then behind him, an arm appeared, holding ice and fails to pour on him.] [Angry reaction] This is treason disguised as a play! [Orders] Guards, seized them!
Flame Guards: [Approaching Finn and Jake]
Finn: What!? No!
Flame Guards: [Pinning Finn and Jake to the ground]
Finn & Jake: [Grunts]
Finn: Please, we were trying to warn you about the assassins!
Flame King: Hmmmmm, search them!
Flame Guard: Hmmmm, [Surprised] Huh? [Sniffs the candles] Sire! It's your daughter's scented candles.
Finn: Ahh... ahh, ah.
Flame King: Sickos! [Orders] Off with their heads!
Jake: Whoa, what!?
Audience: [Cheering and chattering] Yes!
Furnius: Sssstay sssstill.
Torcho: [Evil laughter]
Finn: Untied shoelace? [Gasps] It's them!
Furnius: Sssso long, ssssuckers!
Finn: NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES!
Flame King: [Surprised]
Finn: NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES!
Audience: [Gasps and shocked]
Finn: NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES! NAKED BABIES! [Clears throat] We found 'em! The executioners are the real king killers!
Flame King: Wa-wa-wait, wait. That voice. [Orders] Guards, take off their hoods.
Torcho: Here, my identity!
Torcho: [Guilty] Argh
Flame King: [Surprised] Furnius and Torcho!
Furnius: Hello Uuuncle!
Audience: [Shocked and surprised] Wait, what!?
Flame King: [Orders] Arrest the executioners!
Flame Guards: [Arrests the executioners]
Flame King: Hmmmm, [Points right finger at Furnius and Torcho] I thought I had you two extinguished.
Furnius: You cannot quench the flamessss of revenge!
Torcho: You snucked on our father to become king!
Flame King: Oh, yeah! Hehe. [Orders] Take them to the punishment room!
Flame Guards: [Takes Furnius and Torcho to the punishment room.]
Furnius: I'll dessstroy all of you, with ice!
Torcho: Release me!
Finn: Wait! So, you? You extinguished their dad?
Flame King: [Yes tone]
Finn: And everyone is evil here?
Flame King: [Performs a stunt towards the stage]
Flame King: [Yes tone] All evil.
Finn: Then, is Flame Princess: evil or maybe chaotic neutral?
Flame King: She's evil.
Finn: Okay, so your daughter's evil. We've established that, but do you think if a good guy really liked her, could he, change her to good?
Flame King: Hmmmmm, well, there'd be penalties to her experience, if she acted out of alignment. But, yes, someone could change her.
Finn: [Smiles happily]
Finn & Jake: [Leaves the stage]
Flame King: [Thinks about his daughter] Change her to good? [Worried]
[Scene cuts to Flame Princess's house]
[Through window, Finn and Jake look at Flame Princess sleeping.]
Flame Princess: [Breathing]
Jake: [Picks the scented candles and lights them with Flame Princess's hair] [Then puts them on her bedside table]
[Then suddenly, Flame King appears on the candles.]