[The episode begins at a local circus. A giant jellyfish and an elephant snail are performing in the center ring. The elephant snail makes its loud trumpet roar, spitting saliva onto SpongeBob and Patrick.]
SpongeBob and Patrick: I heart the circus! [laughs]
Ringmaster: Children of all ages! Get ready to wet your baggy pants laughing! Send in the clowns! [grabs his assistant and uses him like a whip] He-yah!
[A small car enters the center ring. It drives around and around until several clowns come out.]
Ringmaster: Our candy-corn-fed clowns once roamed the slapstick plains where wild clowns run free! [grabs his assistant and uses him as a whip again] He-yah! [the clowns line up; he whips them again] He-yah! [the clowns form into a pyramid; he whips them again] He-yah! [the clowns form into a ferris wheel; he whips them again] He-yah! [the clowns form into a balloon donkey; it brays and explodes]
[The clowns wave at the audience.]
SpongeBob and Patrick:[cheering wildly]
Patrick: Look, there's those!
SpongeBob:[sees a small clown] Oh. Are you hungry, little clown? [tries to feed the little clown a piece of popcorn, but the ringmaster whips them]
Ringmaster: He-yah! Don't feed the clowns!
SpongeBob:[melts in his body] Why not?
Patrick: Huh? [pulls SpongeBob together] SpongeBob, are you mad? Clowns are dangerous animals. Why, at any moment, one of those things could get loose and bite our feet off! [pulls off his feet]
SpongeBob: Oh, Patrick, that little clown wouldn't do that. He was friendly.
[The little clown waves at the audience until he notices his clown friends climbing back into their car. The little clown pushes the bigger clown in the car and follows them in. The car crashes into a pole and the clowns fall out unconscious. An ambulance drives into the ring. Two paramedics come out with a stretcher. SpongeBob and Patrick biting their nails in worry. The paramedics carry the clowns to the ambulance. The little clown climb on to the top, takes out a flower and pretends to die. Then wakes up and waves to the audience. The audience laughs.]
SpongeBob:[laughs] I wanna go backstage and see the clowns, Patrick.
Patrick: I told you, SpongeBob, our feet are in danger!
SpongeBob:[grabs Patrick just as he was about to leave] I'll protect you.
[SpongeBob drags Patrick backstage and hides behind some crates.]
[The clowns walk into a pen as if they were farm animals. The clowns lick themselves, pick on each other's hair and sniff around. The little clown walks up and takes off his hat.]
Little Clown: Huh?
[The tall clown takes his foot and pushes the little clown, sending him flying to the ding bell.]
SpongeBob: Poor little guy.
[The ringmaster dumps candy in a bin and whistles for the clowns. The clowns run up and eat the candy like animals. The little clown wants to eat some, but couldn't get in between the bigger clowns. The big clowns walk away, leaving the little clown with no food.]
SpongeBob: Hey, he didn't get any food. Hmm. [sneaks away and walks up to the sad, little clown] Hey, psst!
Little Clown: Huh? [hooing happily as SpongeBob is about to feed him popcorn]
[SpongeBob dumps popcorn in the little clown's hands, but the ringmaster catches them and whips them.]
Ringmaster: Don't feed the clowns!
[SpongeBob screams and runs away from the circus with Patrick.]
Patrick: My feet!
Ringmaster: Pack it up, everyone. [whips again] He-yah!
[The clowns fold up the tent like an umbrella and pack up all of their props. The little clown attempted to help, but he gets stepped on and pushed around by the other clowns. The clowns load up the car, including the elephant snail, and begin to drive away. The little clown gets up and tries to catch up to the circus, but they kept on driving. The little clown is now lost and alone. The scene changes to SpongeBob dragging a bag of popcorn the next morning.]
SpongeBob: I don't care what that mean old ringmaster says. That clown is hungry, and I'm gonna feed him. [sees cotton candy flying everywhere, but the circus is not there] Hey, where'd the circus go? Now I'll never find that little clown.
[SpongeBob trips over something and drops his bag of popcorn. He gets up and sees the little clown. The little clown gets scared and squirts SpongeBob with his flower.]
SpongeBob:[gets choked on with water and gulps it down] There you are.
[The little clown squeaks.]
SpongeBob: Hey, little clown. The circus left without you! Quick, we gotta get you back to your clown friends. [tries to get the little clown moving, but the clown refused to budge] Oh, you don't want to go back to the circus?
[The little clown shakes his head, saying "no."]
SpongeBob: You don't want to be a circus clown?
[The little clown holds out a circus pennant and eats it. He then waves his hand in front of his face and makes his frown into a smile.]
SpongeBob: You know, little clown, I don't blame you. You shouldn't stay in a place where they push you around all the time. Looks like I'll have to help you find a new job. But what else can you do?
[The little clown points to a hot dog stand.]
SpongeBob: Oh, you want to work there? [the little clown nods his head, saying "yes."] This job should be a snap, little clown. Watch me. [shows the little clown how to make a hot dog] ♪Pick up the hot dog, put it in a bun, add the mustard, relish, now you're having fun♪ [the little clown eats the hot dog]
Customers: Oh-ho-ho, hot dog! Look at that. [holds up money] Looks like fun!
SpongeBob:[quietly] Okay, you're on.
[The little clown takes out several hot dogs without the tongs. The hog dogs burn the little clown's hand and juggles them. He throws the hot dogs in the customers eyes, which causes them to scream. The little clown squirts mustard in the customers mouths with his flower. The customers run off until the hot dog vendor arrives.]
Vendor: My wieners! [growls]
SpongeBob: Oh, is this your cart? Sorry.
[The vendor grabs SpongeBob and the little clown. He stuffs SpongeBob in a bun like a hot dog and sprits the little clown on him like mustard. The vendor throws SpongeBob and the little clown away. The scene changes to SpongeBob's house.]
SpongeBob: I think you'll get a job a lot quicker if we tone down the whole clown thing a smidge. Don't worry. When I get through with you, your own ringmaster won't recognize you.
[Several balloon animals pop on the screen. SpongeBob shaves the little clown's hair. He turns the little clown's pants strap into a tie. He puts a tuxedo on the little clown and replaces the clown's shoes with regular shoes. SpongeBob smooches himself and shows the little clown his new look. SpongeBob puts one more detail on the clown: a mustache. The little clown is happy and claps. The scene changes to a department building.]
SpongeBob: "Businessmen wanted." [opens the door] Go get 'em, little clown. Oh, I mean, Mr. Little Clown. [laughs as the little clown enters the building]
[The little clown presents himself to the CEO.]
CEO: Hmm? [grabs the little clown and puts him in his work station] Here's your stool. Here's your stamper. Now get to work.
[The little clown begins his job and stamps several paperwork.]
SpongeBob:[teary-eyed] Aww. [sheds a tear and leaves]
[The little clown continues stamping the papers. He then stamps the papers with his feet. Then he stamps ink all over his face. He stamps his face onto the papers. He jumps on the conveyor belt and hops up and down. He stamps a checkmark on two employers and a no sign on another. A security guard drags the employer with the no sign out. The CEO hears the commotion.]
[He sees the little clown stamping his buttocks on the papers and making a total mess. He growls and pulls the conveyor belt down towards him.]
CEO: Who hired this clown?!
CEO's assistant: Um, you did, sir.
[The little clown squeaks. The CEO gets really mad and explodes a mushroom cloud over his head.]
[The little clown screams and runs out of the building. SpongeBob is flipping a coin until the little clown runs into him.]
SpongeBob: What happened, little clown? Didn't you like that job?
[The little clown nods his head, saying "no", blows up a whoopee cushion and presses on it.]
SpongeBob: Hmm. [sees a fire hydrant] Ooh!
[The scene changes to SpongeBob taking the little clown, who is now dressed in his firefighting outfit, to the Bikini Bottom Fire Department.]
SpongeBob: Maybe a career in firefighting.
[SpongeBob opens the door and the little clown goes in the fire department. The fire engine drives out with the little clown.]
SpongeBob: Have a nice fire! [the little clown waves a SpongeBob; SpongeBob goes to leave until he stops] I'll just make sure he gets there safely. [smacks his head and his bump glows red; then he makes siren sounds]
[The fire engine drives up to Mrs. Puff's Boating School as it is completely on fire. The ladder crashes into the school's burning sign and firefighters struggle to put out the fire. The little clown clings onto the hose as SpongeBob arrives at the scene.]
Mrs. Puff:[sticks herself out the window] Save me! Save me! I'm too young to broil!
[The little clown screams and grabs a bucket. He climbs up a ladder and instead of saving her and putting out the fire, he throws confetti in her face. The entire boating school becomes engulfed in flames until everything is burnt to a crisp.]
Mrs. Puff:[panting and puffs herself up] You're fired!
[Mrs. Puff's outburst causes the little clown to fall to the ground. The scene changes to SpongeBob and the little clown at the bakery.]
SpongeBob: This is it, little clown. The last job available in Bikini Bottom. [puts a chef's hat on the little clown's head]
[The little clown whimpers and gets really nervous.]
SpongeBob: If you can just stop the clowning for two minutes, you'll have a job. Please! Sorry, little clown. It's been a long day. [laughs feebly] Good luck. [laughs]
[The little clown waves his hand at his face and makes his frown become a smile. The little clown enters the bakery and SpongeBob peeks through the window.]
SpongeBob: Huh? [sees through donuts] Hmm. [gets blocked by a cake] Hmm. Aha! [pushes out his eyeballs] Now get in there, eyes, and stay close to that clown.
[SpongeBob's eyeballs run into the bakery and go to watch over the little clown.]
Head baker: Your job is to pack up the pies!
[The little clown salutes in agreement.]
Head baker: Hmm! [leaves]
[SpongeBob's eyeballs hide behind some boxes. The little clowns sniffs some pies. He remembers how he used to throw pies at the clowns as part of his act at the circus. He also remember how he loved getting himself pied in the face. He looks over at the head baker, who is busy baking, and goes over to throw a pie at him. SpongeBob's eyeballs yelp in fear.]
SpongeBob: No! No, little clown! No! [runs into the bakery]
[As the little clown prepares to throw the pie, SpongeBob comes in the kitchen. The little clown throws the pie.]
SpongeBob:[slow motion] No! [gets pied in the face] Phew! [laughs]
[The little clown pies the head baker in the face. He starts to act crazy and throws pies all over the place. He throws pies at three bakers and several customers waiting in line outside.]
SpongeBob: Hot cobbler pie?!
[Nat Peterson gets pied with the hot cobbler pie and his face burns and melts off.]
SpongeBob: Lemon pie?!
[A little kid gets pied with the lemon pie and her face sours up.]
SpongeBob: Honey pie?!
[Fred gets pied with the honey pie.]
Fred:[licks some honey] Mmm! [gets stung by jellyfish until his face is swollen]
[The little clown grabs SpongeBob's eyes and stuffs them in a pie. Then he throws the pie with the eyeballs in them at SpongeBob.]
SpongeBob: Eye pie!
[The head baker gets really angry. The pie batter hardens up around him and cracks into pieces. He growls and grinds his teeth.]
Head baker: You... Are...
[The head baker grabs SpongeBob and the little clown. He rolls them up into a batter and forms them into pie. He then puts them both into a box and ties them up.]
Head baker: Au revoir!
[The head baker rings the bell and a deliver man takes it. He drives his pie truck away from the bakery and gives the pie to a lady sitting on the bench.]
Tina Fran: Huh? I didn't order a pie. [opens the box and SpongeBob and the little clown pop out; scaring her away]
SpongeBob: Oh, little clown, I'm so sorry. I thought you needed a day job, but you're a clown. And a clown needs to run free.
[The scene changes to SpongeBob and the little clown traveling through the kelp forest. SpongeBob chops through the kelp with his knife. He peeks through the kelp and reveals a colorful world full of clowns. Clowns are riding on balloon animals, eating candy for food, throwing pies at eating other, and doing other crazy things clowns do at the circus. The little clown was so happy and hugs SpongeBob. He joins the other clowns, who examine him by sniffing him. The spray water at him and the other clown throws at pie at his friend. The little clown takes out a hammer and smacks the other clown with it.]
SpongeBob: Aww. [gets pie splattered on his pants]
[The little clown waves good-bye to SpongeBob and runs off to join the other clowns.]
SpongeBob: Aww. [sheds a tear and gets pied in the face]
[The little clown squeaks one last time and SpongeBob laughs.]